a simple trinket locked away

41 – the half-month recap

May
30

Clearly, I’ve been lacking in writing. But then again, another day of not needing to vent is another good day in the pocket, no?

But yeah, a few things have happened since my last post, let’s see.

OK, so first and foremost, I TURNED 33, YO. Seriously, how did that even come to be?! I mean, it’s not like I was not expecting to have another birthday. It honestly just feels really weird to have made it to this point. You know those polls that you do when you have to pick an age group and you fall between the 25-34 category? Like, another couple of years and I will be moving up to another category. Just the thought of it sends me chills.
But on this note, I had a great one. I definitely felt all the love that was showered on me that day and given the circumstances I most definitely did not feel alone at all, which was definitely amazing in itself. I mean, yeah okay, so I still had to work and all, but I guess that’s what you do as a responsible adult, right? So yup, I got older. Well done, me.

Second, I finally got to step out of the house for the first time since March 16th, and that definitely felt really odd. All in all, I must have stayed indoors at all times for about a couple of months give or take. Let’s be real now, I know I’m an indoorsy introvert and all that, but even that was A LOT for me to endure. I felt so awkward being out and it even got to the point that I got carsick, which was definitely a bummer, noting that I live on commuting back and forth so many hours per day on any normal working day. Let’s say if the Government is indeed telling us to go back to work as soon as what the media has been telling us, then I am thoroughly fucked. I have to get through this car sickness as soon as possible, or else I’m screwed. I guess this is partly what the quarantine has done to me. Wow.

As far as I wanna try to not mention work, some part of it has been.. I don’t know how to put it. Say, ironically equal parts of exciting and disappointing. And this is not me trying to say things about going back to work because it’s a completely different subject. As far as I wanna open up on this topic I guess I’ll just leave it at this because hey, really, I know this is not a very publicly read blog but again, I really don’t know who’s reading my blog so I’m not taking any chances right now. I guess there will be more of this when things actually happen.

While we’re on the topic of disappointment, my laptop died. I put it to sleep at night just like I always do every night, and it just completely refused to wake up and that’s it, really. I’m trying not to be too bummed about it but .. come on, it’s my laptop. Even though I still have my work laptop on which I am dictating this entry on but it just feels different. And come on, it’s not even two years old, is it even supposed to get fried that soon? Oh well. I guess that’s a solid reason for me to wish that shopping centres would be open soon so that I can get my baby checked ¬†and possibly repaired. Hopefully.

And what do you know, for once I actually made a bit of a long entry without thinking over for too long, ha.

40 – the walking contradiction

May
16

I almost find it comically ironic how I nearly screamed when the office e-mailed yesterday, telling everyone to go back to the office on May 26th. Ha ha some birthday gift, huh?

You probably could tell how I’ve been struggling with this quarantine from my previous post, but honestly I am not sure if I’m ready for it to be over this quick. I nearly howled reading that e-mail last night.

Tsk, Wina. When will you ever stop contradicting yourself so often?

[UPDATE: the WFH thing got extended. Yay, birthday at home!]

39 – the beat goes on

May
12

How many days has it been? who’s been counting by now, meh.

At least there hasn’t been any extension since the last post, I guess for now it counts as a positive development? IDK. Getting back to the office is still off the books for now, though. And that kind of sucks because the next time I get to step back to the office, it’ll be the new working space, none of us working under the big tree anymore. (OK, that tree was a huge logistic pain, but the sentimentality, Goddamn it!)

It just feels different. Relocating in 2012 was the biggest pain of my life back then. I didn’t even get to lift a finger now as everything was done for me. Of course, my anxiety has been dancing in the back of my mind since then but eh. Trust is the main factor here, let’s just hold on to hope that my team had packed everything, and by that, I mean every. single. thing.

Two weeks counting down to my birthday. Not that it matters that much, but I just feel kind of weird to be feeling celebratory right now. Yeah well, I guess let’s just see what happens by then, if it does.

Right. I know this post is pretty much just brain fart, but since I’ve made it a mission to keep this post streak going as frequent as I can, might as well, no?